Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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