trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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