I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize