i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize