the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize