Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize