Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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