and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
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I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
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My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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