I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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