she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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