He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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