I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
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