you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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