i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish life had little blips of pornography
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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