Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize