There is no way he is gay with that hair.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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