I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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