I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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