Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
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