yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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