The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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