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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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