Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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