the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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