We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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