Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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