wrigley field is MILF paradise
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize