i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
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I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
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Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
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