My hair reeks of homosexuality.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize