"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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