I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize