Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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