I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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