Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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