maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
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I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
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just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
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