you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize