If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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