She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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