Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize