I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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