drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
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I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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