and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came on her dog
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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