With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
it glows. i had to have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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