Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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