He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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