smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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