I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
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