dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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