I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
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do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
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He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
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