Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize